


My Grandfather's Axe

by Toiski



Category: RWBY
Genre: Arguing, Female Friendship, Friendship, Girls with Guns, Guns, Hugs, Nerdiness, Paradox, Ship of Theseus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-06
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-09-15 08:13:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9226181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toiski/pseuds/Toiski
Summary: Paradox: "This the very same axe my grandfather used. After his death, my father replaced the rotted haft. After my father's death, I replaced the rusted head."Ruby gets much too excited about weapons. This time, it's all Weiss' fault, really.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is a play on the "Ship of Theseus" paradox (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ship_of_Theseus), a variant of which is stated more concisely in the summary. However, the story is not about that at all. It's about Ruby and Weiss.

”Hey, Weiss.” Ruby peeked over my shoulder, and I closed my notebook, leaving a finger to mark the page.

I sighed and twisted in my chair to face out peerless leader. ”Yes, Ruby? Need help with your homework again?”

She rocked back and forth on her heels and toes. ”Nope, finished that yesterday.” That was unusual. ”I was wondering if you knew any place with a good rotating broaching machine. The ones in the weapons lab only go up to point five ten groove dee.” I waited for a moment for her to clarify. ”Like a newer Carmine-Bragg, but not the benchtops. They don't do gain twist.”

When it became clear that no further explanation was forthcoming, I raised an eyebrow. ”I have no idea what you just said.”

She froze in place and looked at me like I'd just kicked Zwei. ”Seriously?”

I pulled my finger from between the notebook and turned all the way around in my chair. This was going to be one of _those_ conversations. _Crescent Rose_ things. ”Humor me.”

She shook her head and sighed like I had just said I don't know what soap and showers are. Very slowly, like talking to a child, she said: ”You know about rifled barrels, right?” When I nodded, she continued. ”I want to manufacture a new barrel for Crescent Rose, and I need a machine that can make larger diameters.”

”What's wrong with the old barrels?” As soon as the question had left my mouth, I realised I'd doomed myself to possibly _hours_ of nerd talk. ”No, wait...” She smiled, and all I could think was 'Oh my, what big teeth you have, grandma'. I'd practically crawled right into the Beowulf''s maw.

She pulled up another chair next to mine and fished an ammo catalog out of some hidden pocket in her combat skirt. ”I'm glad you asked,” she said, brandishing the thick catalog like an axe at my execution.

Oh no, she had reference materials.

She pried the tome open at a spot marked with a post-it note. ”Atlus is making the twenty millimeter Tarrasque available to hunters and huntresses!” She tapped an image of something that would seem like a triply magnified rifle cartridge if not for the '1:1' under it. ”I love the twelve seven by one oh eight Dusky, but it can only pack so much punch, right? Besides, I think we're ready to grow up a bit.”

I chose to let her strange choice of word pass by my ears. The rest of it was enough to object to in any case. ”Why not just buy a new gun? Wouldn't it be easier to fit a scythe blade onto another body?”

”Weiss!” She seemed seriously insulted. ”What would you say if I made wig out of your hair, put it on your sister, and started calling her by your name?”

I was so taken aback by her incongruous and vaguely creepy comparison that it took me a few seconds to pick where to start poking holes in her hyperbole. ”Ruby...” No, still not there. ”First, that is a weird and scary thought and I will thank you to never mention it again. Secondly, weapons and people are different. Besides, you change out parts all the time.”

”Yeah, but that's maintenance.” She made a 'one-thing, another-thing' gesture with her hands.

”Most of it is new parts, correct? You change the blade bits all the time.”

”I recast the broken ones. Maybe some realloying sometimes.”

I started counting on my fingers. ”You made a new receiver last month.”

”The old one was getting dinged up.”

”You swapped all the bearings.” Two fingers.

”Well, that's normal wear and tear. You cut your fingernails, it's the same thing!”

No, it wasn't. ”You said something about changing the entire blowback mechanism last fall.” Three fingers total, although I could have gotten more if I remembered the parts one by one.

”I kept the gas piston tube.”

”You changed that last week with the bolt carrier and locking somethings.” Finger, thumb, finger on the other hand.

”Uh...”

”I'm pretty sure you swapped the grip and stock too.” Two more fingers.

”The old ones were _plastic._ I can CNC cut aluminum here!”

”Have you switched calibers earlier?”

”Seven six two Dragonhoof is for _kids_.”

This went on for a while, with me naming every weapon part I was reasonably sure existed and her confirming it had been swapped, removed, retooled, or added.

I'd long run out of fingers. ”There are really no parts left from the original?” I might have raised my voice a _little_ at this point.

”Well it's not like you were born like _that_ either!” She pointed an accusatory finger at my b... chest. ”Me and Crescent Rose went through puberty together!”

” _Puberty!?_ ”

At this point there was a knock on the wall of our room.

I took stock of the situation. At some point we had both leapt to our feet, I was breathing hard, and Ruby had overturned her chair. ”Weapons are _things_ , Ruby,” I hissed, much quieter now. ”Things to be bought, or sold, or handed down when you're bored of them.”

Ruby's lower lip trembled and her eyes grew moist. ”I'm sorry, Weiss,” she squeaked. ”I didn't know.” Suddenly, she was hugging me tight and there were rose petals in the air. ”And sorry, Myrtenaster,” she mumbled into my shoulder.

I gingerly patted her back, unsure of what her point was. ”It's okay. Winter fights much better with a lighter rapier and main gauche anyway.”

She pushed me away, almost knocking me over, but squeezed my shoulders tightly. Her look was as determined as it ever was in battle. ”Tomorrow we are going to the weapons lab, and I will teach you how to take care of Myrtenaster.”

I glared at her. ”I can do my own maintenance. I sharpen, oil and clean it regularly.”

She shook her head. ”I mean, really make him your own. We can start with the grip, or maybe the pommel weight. Then, when you know what you want, we can...” It was her turn to start counting on her fingers.

I only half listened to her go on and on about all the things she wanted to teach me. I found a small smile tugging at my lips. Maybe this was one skill I could learn from her. Besides, she seemed so excited. Homework could wait.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Technical notes, (simplified, not guaranteed to be accurate):
> 
> Rotating broaching machine - it makes holes in things, but more complicated holes than a drill.  
> Point five ten groove dee - 0.510" groove diameter. Groove diameter is the diameter of a rifled hole's wider (grooved) parts. Rifling is a helix-shaped set of grooves in a gun barrel that makes the bullet rotate.  
> Gain twist - A rifling style where the twist of the helix becomes tighter towards the business end of the barrel, so that the bullet's spin accelerates more smoothly. Sometimes necessary with heavier bullets.  
> Twenty millimeter Tarrasque - A fictional 20mm/0.787" caliber autocannon cartridge named after the monster of Dungeons and Dragons fame. This caliber has been used in man-portable anti-tank rifles.  
> Twelve seven by one oh eight Dusky - 12.7x108mm heavy machine gun and anti-materiel rifle cartridge. The name is a play on the DShK "Dushka" machine gun which uses this calibre. Roughly equivalent to U.S. .50 BMG.  
> Receiver - The part of the gun that the internal components sit in (mostly).  
> Blowback mechanism - A mechanism that uses the energy of firing a bullet to load the next bullet into the firing chamber and prepare the gun to be fired again. There are many different kinds.  
> Gas tube - Part of a gas-operated blowback mechanism.  
> Bolt carrier - thingy that holds and moves the thingy (bolt) that closes the firing chamber from the back and holds the thingy (firing pin) that hits the primer to fire the cartridge.  
> Locking somethings (lugs) - tabs that align the bolt to the firing chamber.  
> Seven six two Dragonhoof - 7.62x54mmR rifle caliber cartridge. Used in e.g. the Dragunov sniper rifle, on which Dragonhoof is a pun. Don't listen to Ruby, it's not for kids.


End file.
